Trigger warning: I'm not going to be pulling any punches & some of the facts in this post are less than cheerful if I'm honest. My brain had a total melt down whilst I was doing the research & I don't think the post is any less stressful. Sorry.
I have been really struggling to find the will to write this year's M.E. awareness day post; partly because I am down again in my ability level, partly because I feel like everything that needs to be said has been said by me or by any number of other M.E. bloggers & partly because I'm over it, you know?
I'm sick of having to educate everyone I speak to over & over again about M.E. & what the difference between the diagnosis of CFS & actually living with M.E. are.
I'm sick of having to fight doctors (& other 'professionals') for every bit of help I need.
I'm sick of knowing that we suffer with two conditions, M.E. & institutionalised ignorance.
I'm sick of being treated like I am choosing to be ill & that it's because I'm lazy or enjoying it or scamming the system or whatever.
I'm sick of having a condition that is almost like a political position (like being big into recycling or something).
I'm sick & tired of being sick & tired.
But honestly, what I am most sick of is knowing that if my doctors saw the name of any other condition on their computer monitors they would take my symptoms a hell of a lot more seriously.
I'm aware that things are different in other countries but in the UK M.E. cuts you off from a lot of treatment/support/medical options.
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